Tuesday, June 13, 2006

LESSONS IN POWER: Introduction

After my very first post "Lessons in Power", many have requested that I document my experiences in SRCM. To address these requests, I am integrating this first post into a series of 8 sections which will be published over the coming weeks:

1. The Founder's Last Years - describing my experiences in the Mission during Babuji's last years from 1979 to 1983

2. Death of the Master - Chariji's Early Days - outlining the power struggle that followed Babuji's death and Chari's establishment as the new President and Spiritual Representative of Babuji.

3. The Publishing Commitee - my experiences during my invovlement in recording and publishing Chari's speeches.

4. Establishing New Principles - observations regarding Chariji's efforts to establish "Service and Obedience to the Mission" as a new key directive in the practice of Sahaj Marg

5. My Departure - description of my departure from the mission

6. Meeting New Masters - exploration of the history of Sahaj Marg

7. Recovering from SRCM - my recovery process from more than 10 years of indoctrination

8. Analysis - My personal analysis of how cultism evolves and the source of a Guru's power.

LESSONS IN POWER Part 1: The Founder's Last Years
When I joined SRCM in 1979, I was 19 years old. I had taught myself to meditate at the age of 13 and wished to receive some training and guidance. I sought out a low key organization that didn’t want money or exploit people. I was not interested in joining a cult but sincerely wanted to explore how meditation could calm the mind and help one in their journey towards God. Sahaj Marg seemed perfect for me. This organization seemed not to be about money at all. Several key factors attracted me.

1. Prosthelytizing was not encouraged

2. Training was offered for free

3. There was no focus on buildings or property

4. The practice did not involve cultural or religious indoctrination

5. Focus on experience as opposed to study of the practice

At the time I joined, Babuji was in his last years. I traveled to Denmark in 1980 to meet him for the first time. Here I also met Chari, his apparent right hand man when traveling abroad. Chari was a very westernized, Dunhill smoking Indian executive. He seemed very European and interacted well with the westerners. He was clearly part of Babuji’s inner circle.

The Danish center was one of the first in the west, with an impressive group of middle aged, successful abhaysis who seemed to love Babuji had integrated Sahaj Marg into their European lifestyle. This impressed me, as they did not dress up as Indians or pretend to be something other than Danes.

Babuji spoke little, preferring to sit with his disciples and smoke his sweet tobacco smelling hooka pipe. When he traveled, he would publish a short message in lieu of giving public talks, and instead remained available for people to simply sit quietly with him. Occasionally, he would offer to meditate with the group.
It was a compelling experience for a young impressionable 20 year old such as myself.

I followed him to Munich where things turned dark. Andre Poray, who was a senior French Preceptor was there and appeared to be a rival of Chari’s. The rumors were that Andre, while extremely successful in attracting large numbers in France, had also attracted people who were not necessarily sincere in their spiritual practice but were interested in black arts. I can’t say for sure whether these rumors were true or not, but, I witnessed the beginning of a very dark series of events. Babuji suddenly stopped being available to the larger group, and Chari’s demeanor went from jovial westernized Indian to being very curt and secretive.

I left Munich this point, but others close to me told stories of Babuji and Chariji showing up for a group meditation dressed in black. A group meditation occurred where some one meditating in the crowd shouted out and became delirious. Andre Poray helped to remove him from the room and the sitting was topped. Babuji quickly left the scene with Chari. Later Chari was quoted as saying, “I will never go to France again”. Given that he was in Germany, the assumption was that this little incident had something to do with the goings on in France and the rivalry between Andre Poray and Chari.
Having missed some of these incidents, I choose not to think too much about them until much later in my practice.

Prior to my first trip to India in 1981, three Indians did an un-authorized tour of the US. Babuji’s son, Umesh Saxena, and two senior preceptors, Ragavendra Rao and RamaChandra Reddy. They stayed in my center for a week or more, and traveled a bit to centers in the US. It was made clear however that this was an “unofficial” visit. The intent of this trip seemed innocent at the time. I befriended the two senior Preceptors, and they clearly made great efforts to get favor with the Americans, going so far as to dress up in western suits when meeting prospective abhyasis for the first time.

Umesh, Babuji’s son, seemed to me to be along for the ride. He was not a preceptor, and occasionally took sittings. He told a few stories about pretending to give sittings to kids while growing up. There was some talk about him being able to transmit because he was Babuji’s son, but, he was for some reason not allowed to do so. In retrospect, this was the second incident I witnessed that indicated some internal strife within the organization that had been created to make Sahaj Marg available, but at the time, I was young and naive, and willing to overlook the obvious.

I traveled to India in 1981 and stayed in the Ashram in Shahjahanpur. It was the only property the Mission owned at the time – a beautiful complex located a few miles from Babuji’s house. Prior to this property, abhyasis would stay at Babuji’s house. The ashram was built to accommodate the larger numbers that started to travel to visit Babuji. No money was requested, but donations were accepted to pay for food and operations. The basic feeling was that of hospitality, we were Babuji’s guests.

The last time I saw Babuji was in France. Chari, who was not invited, went against his statement in Munich and showed up anyway. It was clear at this time that Andre Poray and Chari were in a bitter power struggle and a public display for the masses was put on. Andre ran the show, giving long talks and being seen with Babuji. Chari hid in his room and gave sittings. Privately he complained about the goings on in France. At one point he said, “I want to get up and give a talk of my own by putting a microphone to my heart and say, hear the voice of the Master”. He was allowed to give a talk, his talk was lengthy as well. I remember innocently telling him that it was a good talk but it was a bit long. He seemed shocked by this comment.
During this last visit to the west, Babuji was frail and made few public appearances. In one appearance he was walked down the isle to give a sitting, two large men held each arm. His legs would give out and he would start to fall, they would hold him up and continue to walk him down towards the stage. I was sitting at the edge of the isle looking down sadly when Babuji was being walked by me. At that instant, in spite of the two men holding him up, he fell over on top of me. I was shocked and devastated. The message I received from this was that he was dying. This overshadowed the rest of the gathering, and overwhelmed any thoughts of the ongoing power struggle between Poray and Chari.

LESSONS IN POWER Part 2: Death Of The Master - Chari's Early Days

In 1983 Babuji grew sick. Conflicting messages came from various factions throughout India. Umesh Saxena clearly was attempting to take the stage by sending notices that Babuji would be healed and would live to the age of 100 or more. Babuji finally passed. At this point in time, the battle began for control of the Mission.

Chari immediately produced his letter from Babuji stating that he was the designated successor. Umesh Saxena wrote a letter to all centers saying in broken English “I have little evidence that Chari’s claims are not correct”. Ragavendra Rao and his associates appeared to side with Umesh, and a legal battle ensued which prevented Chari from having control of the Ashram in Shahjahanpur. Chari eventually gained sufficient legal status to establish himself as the President of the Mission. He garnered support from the west, having befriended the more senior disciples in Denmark, Germany and the US. Almost immediately, he traveled to the west to establish his base, making speeches and publishing every talk he made for the masses to read.
I made one trip to India to where Lalaji’s birthday was to be celebrated in Shahjahanpur. Chari choose to be there, although he was clearly not invited. A large group of Chari supporters arrived with Chari a week before the celebrations. Chari stayed in Babuji’s cottage, and kept Babuji’s Chair empty and visible as a symbol. I had married an Indian and spent my time with the Indian contingent and was asked to help with nighttime security, walking the compound. On the third night, an Indian friend told me that my help was not needed and that I should do and sleep. A jeep had pulled up and there was lots of talking going on. Clearly some sort of incident was about to happen, and the Indians were trying to protect me from it. That morning, I awoke to find gates locking the entrances to the dormitory. The water shut off, and all the staff who ran the Ashram were gone or hiding.
People were able exit from small doors from the dormitory, and eventually it was decided that we were to all move to the farm next door run by the Tandon family, who were loyal to Chari. We stayed in tents and camped there in view of the Ashram. I was delegated as the Western Representative as I had recently had a suit tailored in India and had it with me. Chari seemed to like my innocent, and sincere way of explaining things. I was asked to have my account typed up by a typist, but in fact Chari dictated the entire account himself while I was present. I was sent to speak with the local magistrate and gave interviews to the press about the “international incident” that had occurred in Shahjahanpur. I took a letter signed by US abhyasis to the US embassy to file a formal complaint about our treatment there. This gained me lots of favor from Chari and allowed me a peek into his Inner Circle. The next year I was made Preceptor.

Lessons In Power Part 3: The Publishing Committee

Prior to my becoming a preceptor, the Zonal Secretary of the US had befriended me and asked me to be involved in the North American Publishing Committee. Since I was an engineer who designed digital recording equipment for a living, my skills were directed towards recording and editing Chari’s speeches. I remained on the periphery of the NAPC. The members of that committee were senior abhyasis who were loyal to Chari. Their efforts were clearly important to Chari and being a member of this committee afforded up close and personal meetings with him that often pre-empted other activities. Members of this committee used their involvement to gain exclusive access to Chari as a result. The atmosphere within the committee was that of exclusivity and importance. Chari’s style of managing this group was to insist on his total control of the flow of his words into published tapes, videos, and books. My involvement was tolerated due to the need for technical expertise, but in no way was I accepted into the inner fold. Secret meetings occurred without me on regular basis. These meetings generally involved discussions around the content of what was being published and I was only involved in discussions that required logistical or technical decisions.

While I was sufficiently trusted to be allowed into this exclusive circle, activities in this committee required intense interaction with Chari and members jealously guarded that privilege by keeping me at arms length. Here I saw for the first time how a Guru uses his inner circle draw people in, and test their devotion to him. Others clearly saw that this was an opportunity for relative new comers such as myself to shine and gain favor. Subtle efforts were made to insure that my work was overshadowed by theirs. I was tasked with the un-glamorous work of running tape recorders and editing the recordings for publication. My job was to insure that Chari had a copy of every speech as soon as the speech was over. This was sufficiently important to him that I was allowed to deliver these tapes personally, however, other members of the committee would occasionally insist on intervening and delivering these tapes themselves. The unique attention I created from this new attention getting task was not going be allowed to be exclusively mine!

Volumes of tape recordings were produced on a yearly basis, and it was my job to edit out French translation and delete harsh language. Chari appeared to improvise many of his speeches, and there were times when he needed his words changed by recording over phrases that he did not intend to say for posterity. Chari insisted on absolute control over his words. My job was to insure that bootleg recordings were discouraged and even confiscated.

There seemed to be a dire concern that if abhyasis were allowed to make their own recordings Chari’s control over his intellectual property was breached. Rumors of abhyasis caught sharing bootleg speeches with others were investigated, and if found to be true, I would be asked to approach them and get all copies of tapes to secure Chari’s absolute control over the distribution of his words. By this time there was a large and growing group of French abhyasis who followed Chari around the world. They were particularly upset with me, as many were not fluent in English and used the tapes to interpret his speeches and private conversations. I was instructed to promise them that a French translation of the speech would be available at a later date.

The Publishing Committee became increasingly interested in recording Chari’s private discussions. There was constant pressure to “know” when to turn on a tape recorder, and when, to shut it off. I was often chastised by members of the Committee for not recording something said in private, and at other times for allowing discussions to be recorded. Chari always reserved the right to have certain discussions erased or confiscated. Often in private, he would interrupt and ask if the tape recorder was on, when he was going to say something he particularly did or did not want published.

He had established a sense of urgency within the Committee members to produce as much volume as possible, and left things sufficiently vague to create second guessing and rancor amongst the Committee members. Over time it was resolved that there were two primary objectives, generate as much of his published words as possible, and maintain absolute control over the content and distribution of his words.

These objectives had two benefits for Chari. First was the revenue that the constant flow of new publications generated, as a supply and demand relationship was exploited around any new material that Chari produced. The second and more insidious benefit was that Chari could now re-interpret the practice of Sahaj Marg and systematically insert himself and any new messages of his own, into the constant flow of published speeches. Since Chari was particularly verbose, there was no shortage of opportunities to generate more content to be published. Eventually the pressure to record private talks evaporated as public speeches provided plenty of opportunities to find material.

The Mission was still young in the west, anddid not charge money to abhyasis for training. This created challenges early on as these publications required up front money. Chari devised a plan where disciples were encouraged to purchase life subscriptions for puplications of Chari's new works. A sufficiently large fee was charged such that the bank interest from the fees could be used to fund the publishing efforts. Members had benefits of early access to new publications and in some instances exclusive access. With the publishing machine now funded and well oiled with capital, Chari used this machine to gradually shift attention away fro Babuji and his written words, and focus it squarely on himself and his dedication to grow the Mission as an example of devotion to his Master.

Lessons In Power Part 4: Establishing New Principles

While Chari kept Babuji’s primary message of heart based meditation alive and accurate, he was also slowly inserting new principles and directives for abhyasis. He presented himself as the model abhyasi. His devotion to serving his Master by growing his Mission in size and numbers was becoming a new and repetitive addition the core practice of Sahaj Marg.

As abhyasis came to accept Chari as the Master, a Master whose example should be emulated, they began to accept the same sense of urgency to grow the organization in numbers as a new integral part of their practice. By the sheer volume of text generated annually from Chari’s speeches and the absolute control over its distribution, this new concept of “Serving the Mission” as part of the actual practice of Sahaj Marg was being introduced as a constant underlying message in practically every speech Chari published. Success was measured in the quantity of new abyasis joining the Mission. The lack of growth in numbers was systematically equated to a lack of spiritual growth. A particular Preceptor or even Center was judged by the annual growth of abhyasis and chastized when numbers did not grow significantly on an annual basis.

Integral to the "Growth In Numbers" directive, was a new urgency to move group meditations out of the homes of Preceptors and into purchased or rented meditation halls. In addition, for the first time, Chari began planting the idea that the US should purchase property for its own Ashram. These efforts required money. More wealthy abhyasis eagerly donated to the cause which spawned a flurry of activity to raise more money. Dedicated abhyasis were approached and asked to make regular monthly donations to support this new costly effort to acquire property.

By this time Chari had established a powerful and well financed communications machine to spread the not so sublte message that with Mission Growth, came the need for abhyasis to dig into their wallets and donate money. Large gatherings became revenue generating events, where fees charged for attendance exceeded the expenses. Once gatherings became profitable, the need to reduce overhead by owning, not renting the halls where gatherings took place became tantamount. It was insisted that, these purchased properties were important as the Master could infuse his spiritual power into them and they would become holy places for spiritual gatherings.

By the mid 1980s France had purchased an estate in Augerans and the castle on the estate was transformed into a residence hall for visiting abhyasis and the visiting Master. The US could not be outdone and privately some wealthy Indian abhyasis conspired to purchase some property in Troy New York from an abhyasis. Somehow this deal was not officially sanctioned by Chari. It posed an interesting problem that an individual abhyasi was financially benefiting from the Mission by selling his property to it. The wealthy Indians believed that if they executed a private deal between themselves and the property owner, then donated the property to the Mission, this could be worked around. This created difficult political problems and eventually Mission funds were used for the transaction.

Meanwhile, the initiative to build an Ashram in the US spawned competition between various centers throughout the US to find the perfect site for an Ashram. This flurry of activity was fueled by the belief that an Ashram in your center equated to more favor and access to the Master, Chari.

Within a short 7 years, Chari had completely transformed the Shri Ram Chandra Mission. New principles were being introduced in Chari's speeches that focused on "service to the Mission". This new Mission was being transformed into an organization that required unquestioned loyalty and obedience. Rather than being a light structure used to serve in the spiritual training of abhyasis, service to the Mission was becoming an integral part of the practice of Sahaj Marg.

Lessons in Power Part 5: My Departure

The Gathering:

I arrived at an SRCM gathering in 1988 showered with congratulations from abhyasis I didn't even know. Apparently, without my knowledge, it had been announced to the entire group that I was to become a preceptor. This disturbed me a bit as I wasn't even asked if I wanted the job, and I lived in a particular center that was plagued by in fighting amongst preceptors and senior abhyasis.

In those days I was still impressionable with position and authority, and the glamour of being appointed by the Master to this position without being asked was intoxicating, so I fell for it. In reality, the correct response should have been to just say no, but that would be done for me a few years later.

The reality was that I wasn't appointed because of my spiritual abilities or sincerity, but as a political ploy by a Zonal Secretary who wanted to have the senior preceptor in my center removed. It was a political appointment, and was made clear to me that my job was to help. I reacted by simply making my home open to people for meditation. I tried to avoid the politics by having a quiet place where people could come and meditate without being subjected to the in fighting in the center. I did what I could to shield new abhyasis from the inner rancor of our center.

The Inner Circle Event:

Then a year later it happened. I was drawn into one of Chari's many inner circle love fests - Select abhyasis sitting in Chari's presence without the "riff-raff" present.

Chari, was handing out prasad saying things like, "this is for the beautiful wife of so and so" and "this is for he who wears a scarf"... In retrospect, the scene was not unlike that of a dog trainer throwing treats to his animals to see what tricks they would do for him.

Then he got serious for a moment and said, "This is for he who is pure of heart". The Zonal Secretary blatantly put out his hand to take the prasad, instead, Chari handed it to me. I reached out my hand in awe and took it. Jokingly I told the Zonal Secretary, “If it makes you feel better, that was extremely hard to swallow”.

This was the beginning of the end of my preceptor-ship in Sahaj Marg. From that day on, the Zonal Secretary turned from being my "friend" to doing what he could to marginalize me which ultimately led to my removal as preceptor.

If I was ambitious like others in the inner circle, I would have fought to retain my position, but, by that time, I had learned a little bit about the lure of power, and chose not to. I resigned all my administrative positions within the organization and proceeded to take a very low profile hoping that somehow the Master would intervene.

This is how things work in the inner circle. Those who desire influence and control, fight for it amongst each other in the presence of the Master and behind his back. The Master rewards those left standing with positions of authority. It’s an interesting version of "survival of the fittest". The Zonal Secretary eventually lost to a more ambitious individual; in fact his position was all but eliminated. There's truth to the saying, "He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword."


Chari eventually did intervene. I was removed as a Preceptor in the same manner as how I was made one. No warning, just a letter announcing that while my services as a preceptor were appreciated, they were no longer required. Aside from the method of delivery of this message, I was relieved. Chari was completely unable to tell me what I did wrong other than a cryptic message stating that I should, "Just sit tight and keep a low profile. In six months, I'll make you a preceptor again." He seemed oblivious to the lessons I was learning from all of this. I had just paid a price for selfishly accepting a position of power to begin with, why would I want to be lured into taking it again?

Whatever reasons Chari has for tolerating these goings on in his circle, it was clear that he wasn't about to confide in me. Having still much to learn about the temptations of power, and Chari’s assumption that I was driven by my desire to have it in the form of preceptor-ship, it was clear that he was in no position to guide me at that critical time in my existence. I needed to leave the SRCM to learn this important aspect of reality. I am relieved that I left when I did, as Chari was in no position to provide me with the support or guidance during the dark times ahead of me, nor was any of his "preceptors". SRCM encourages dependence on the Master, what I needed to do was face what was ahead of me alone to learn that in reality, I am not alone nor am I independent.

I have proceeded in my "material" life to have power and authority positions in companies and organizations, reaching a pinnacle in the corporate world. While no doubt I still have much to learn, my conclusions today are as follows:

When Given Power:

1. Understand your responsibility in accepting it

2. Understand why you are given it.

3. Treat it responsibly and execute selflessly

4. Remember that no one is master of the power they have.

5. Power becomes the master to one who becomes attached to it.

In SRCM, these aspects of power are implied in the teachings and philosophy, but no practical training is provided. Worse yet, the SRCM administrative hierarchy is itself entangled in a web of power that takes on a life of its own. Surely Chari understands this, but apparently is willing to let this happen for some end that he cannot explain other than "I am following the instructions of my Master".

We can only hope that the end does justify the means. For myself, I've taken refuge in the private sector and found a bounty of spiritual lessons to learn there. While there is no living, breathing master to guide me through the dark times, guidance comes from the most unexpected places if one remains sensitive to it. To this day I remain grateful for the lessons I have learned from all these events.

I have nothing but love and best wishes for those who practice Sahaj Marg today. I hope that all find their way. For those who wish to leave but fear the consequences, I only hope that I can stand as proof that ones journey continues even outside the bounds of SRCM.

In his early days as a master, Chari was fond of saying, "The Proof of the Pudding is in the eating of it", when justifying spiritual practice verses scholarly study of spirituality.

I would counter; "The goal of one's life is to live it.”

Lessons In Power Part 6: Meeting Other Masters

Right up to the end of my involvement in SRCM, I had truly believed that Chari had a noble objective and somehow the right thing would happen. Instead I was betrayed and treated like a pawn within the inner circle. My example caused fear in the ranks, followed by an unspoken assumption that I clearly must have done something really bad. It was assumed by some, that I was simply a hot head who stood up to authority and questioned the intentions and integrity of people like the Zonal Secretary, but I tried to do the right thing in a very bad situation. I was punished for not completely surrendering to the temptation of spiritual attainment and power.

I exchanged a couple of fruitless correspondences with Chari only to find his story towards me evolve with every iteration. It started with tempting me with restoration of my preceptor position if I would just keep a low profile and stay in the Mission, to insisting that I had been “Disobedient in matters of the Mission”, then praising me as one of his most sincere disciples, one of only two westerners whom he blessed marrying an Indian woman. After saying my good byes to a few friends in the SRCM, I left with a huge sense of relief, never to looked back.

Meanwhile, my troubled marriage with an Indian woman continued. We had not been able to have children for 7 years of marriage, suddenly, after leaving the organization, this difficult relationship became more complicated with the birth of my first son. Chari would always tell us that we should not expect to have children and accept our fate - yet, almost as soon as we departed from the organizaton, the situation changed.

In all this I began my search for answers. A close Indian friend, PEN, who knew and was associated with Ramana Maharshi took me under his wing. This gentle fellow, an engineer by trade, introduced me to a wealth of knowledge about spirituality and yoga. Never once did he expect me to join anything, but simply share in the knowledge and quest. I got interested in the writings of Vivekananda and started to learn about traditional Raja Yoga. PEN took me to a Vedanta society center to get books and explore their culture. PEN, being an extremely westernized Indian, acknowledged strange attitude people associated with Vivekananda had towards women, keeping them separate from men in meditation. I was immediately reminded of how Chari started to enforce this in SRCM in the west. Indian culture seems to want to deal with sexuality in spirituality by pretending its not there. This created a bit of turmoil in me, having just left a cult, I was certainly not going to join another one. I was sufficiently indoctrinated into Indian culture through my marriage. Getting involved in any organization like this would require me to give up entirely my heritage as a westerner. My exploration in this area was acedemic and short.

I had also discovered through an abhyasi who came to me for meditations, that an Indian fellow who knew Lalaji was still alive. I was introduced to a local doctor who had met this man and was starting to have meditation sessions in his home. I met with the Doctor and started to meet people who had gathered in his home, most refugees from a local academy that taught eastern thought. I hesitated to get too involved, but this Indian, who we called Ranaji Saheb, came to stay in the Doctor’s home.

I took time off work to meet him. His demeanor was similar to Babuji’s. He loved to hear people to sing. People would simply sit with him silently with occasional discussion or song. I liked this man, but both he and I knew that I was not about to give my obedience and trust to him or any one else. While Ranaji had made it clear to the Doctor that he must completely submit to him if spiritual progress was to occur, he told me quite a different thing. Ranaji advised that I should explore my Christian roots. Both the Doctor and I had observed the inner circle culture revolving around this man. Ranaji didn’t seem to exploit it, but people attracted to the possibility of gaining spiritual power and advancement by association with him, showed all the typical signs of fighting for his favor and attention. Both the Doctor and I decided to cease our association with Ranaji and I have completely lost track of him and do not even know if he is still alive.

From Ranaji, I learned about Lalaji and his brother. Both were considered spiritual twins. Ranaji explained that Lalaji was a Hindu Sufi of the Naqushabandhi path. Teachers of this path typically did not create organizations, or had singular lineages, but strove to elevate humanity around them by association. Many travel to live with their disciples like a grandfather. Then move on so as not to foster too much attachment to them personally. I learned that a Russian woman, Irina Tweedie, had spent time with a disciple of Lalaji’s brother and started an organization called the Golden Sufi.

Irina had gotten old and reclusive, but her successor Llewellyn Vaughn Lee, and I corresponded for a year or two. This organization focused on dream analysis and meditation. I was not particularly interested in joining, but was very interested in learning more about the history.

My life by this time was flooded with dream like experiences far more profound than those found in my sleeping dreams, so dream analysis intrigued me. I decided to make a trip to New York City when Llewellyn was visiting there. We met in a small group at a book store. He seemed happy to see me and treated me with respect, like a peer of sorts. I appreciated this. The group meditated, followed by people telling Lewellyn about their dreams. A woman who was casually visiting told of a dream, and was convinced that she should attend the next day as a guest of Llewellyns. Others were chastised for their dreams. It was starting to become clear to me that this telling of dreams puts the teller in an extremely vulnerable position. Analysis of dreams can be used to pump up a deflated ego, or tear down an inflated one.

The next day, I attended another meeting. This time, I spoke about one of my real life dream like experiences - my son being born. His mother would not touch him or hold him at the time of birth. The nurse in frustration this unresponsiveness handed my son to me instead. The surroundings became surreal, everyone seemed to disappear. It was only me and my son. In spite of being less than a couple minutes old, he opened his eyes for the first time and looked straight into mine for what seemed to be an eternity. This shook me to the core as it was as if I was looking into the eyes of God. We stood together by a window looking out over the city together for at least 10 minutes. A silent communication occured during that time, that could not be explained in words.

After explaining this story in a somewhat emotional manner, Llewellyn proceeded to tear me apart. Asking me what I really wanted, and why I was there. I stated that I was there to learn about his path. He went on to tell me that I had already been lead down the garden path, believing that spiritual achievement was the goal when simply being was the path.

I left New York City by train that night, thinking about what he had said. What he said was true. I had already concluded that before hearing it from him, but the message was delivered in a manner such that I was humiliated in front of his disciples. I had broken the peer relationship by sharing a dream like experience and becoming vulnerable to a master. Yet again another inner circle experience had occurred. Humiliation was used to determine the sincerity and trust of a potential disciple. I had seen enough. I wrote one last letter thanking Llewellyn for the meeting and never heard from him again.

My last meeting was by happenstance. I met an old local Indian man named Mr. Rao. He taught yoga at a community center and had a small following. He seemed humble and took no money and seemed uninterested in creating much attention around himself. Mr. Rao came to my house for dinner and decided to read my palm and tell me something about myself. He did not read my palm at all, but simply took my hand and looked at me in the eyes. He said the following:

“You were a prodigy in your youth. Had you developed your material and spiritual self simultaneously at an early age, you would have achieved great things by the age of 27, but you did not receive proper guidance and got distracted in the spiritual path you took. Because you did not develop materially at the same time, your efforts in spirituality were fruitless. You lost that chance and must now focus on your material development. By the age of 47, you again will start to find your spiritual and material ballance. You then must develop both aspects of yourself in tandem for some time. You will truly succeed and by the age of 54 will have achieved all that is possible from a balanced existence. Guidance will come to you and you do not need to seek it out.”

It was as if Mr. Rao was using my own words, not his. Intuitively I knew that I had to focus on my career, which was starting to blossom, and somehow deal with an incredibly unhealthy and abusive family life that was evolving in my home.

I had finally come to the end of my quest of eastern spirituality only to find out that I had to develop my western existence and embrace who I already was. I focused the next several years on entrepreneurial efforts, developing my executive management skills and starting my own technology companies. I saw great success materialy. All along, my spiritual quest continued, not in a spiritual setting, but in corporate America. I saw demons and saints in the corporate world. It was there that I finally met a handful of people who knew how to handle positions of power in a selfless manner.

I realized that power, whether spiritual, political or corporate, is power. Humans in positions of power are easily corrupted by it, be it spiritual or corporate. The likelihood of discovering a person who is not corrupted by power is equally possible in a spiritual organization as it is in a corporate setting. Inner circles are created for the same reason in both types of organizations. I found at least the corporate world far more honest about the inner circle’s purpose. The hierarchy has a purpose and is know by all. A President has a function. When they cease to perform, they move on. If they violate ethics they are removed. Unfortunately this does not occur in spiritual organizations. My spiritual quest continued in the offices of corporate America for quite some time. It was several years before I took Ranaji’s advice and re-explored my roots in Christianity.

Lessons In Power Part 7: My Recovery From SRCM

Sahaj Marg is a system of energy manipulation and power. The basis of the practice is to create a craving, or sense of urgency for God realization in the heart. The disciple performs a daily cleaning process using their own will force, to remove the effects of experiences that cause impressions that limit ones spiritual approach. The Guru/Preceptor further uses their own will force to push these spiritual impurities out of the disciple. Transmission is a transfer of spiritual energy through the will force of the Master or a Preceptor to the recipient to establish more advanced spiritual conditions in the disciple.

This entire system revolves around all participants using their own will force to achieve spiritual attainment at a rate that is accelerated compared to ones natural evolution. While Sahaj Marg stands for “Natural Path” it is in fact a practice that cheats nature by using the force of will to accelerate ones natural development. It is based on accepting that one starts from a place of spiritual inadequacy and requires the external will force of others to rectify the situation. The problem that occurred in me practicing Sahaj Marg, was the constant reinforcement of the need to push to a higher level of attainment, no to mention the constant reinforcement of spiritual inadequacy. At the same time humility is required to keep the ego in check. Sahaj Marg solves this problem by establishing the need for a living Master to surrender to.

A forced craving is established within that causes one to become obsessed with spiritual development which diverts ones priorities away from other worldly activities. This is often mistaken for non-attachment, but is in fact the establishment of a new attachment to the achievement of spiritual power through the dependence on the will force of a living Master.

Recovering from spiritual obsession developed under this system is an involved and time consuming process and my case was no exception. I continued to desire spiritual attainment after leaving SRCM and explored spiritual practices that involve manipulating ones inner energy and power to that end. Having cut off my association with any Guru, I was on my own, which turned out to be my saving grace. Every effort to manipulate power for my own spiritual gain resulted in failure. I started to practice Raja Yoga breathing exercises and immediately contracted bronchitis, which discouraged me from continuing.

My experience with the Golden Sufi organization, being publicly humiliated for being associated with a practice that had spiritual attainment as it’s goal was another shock. Meeting Ranaji Saheb, Lalaji’s disciple was another revealing experience. His recommendation that I explore my Christian roots, caused me to question further whether having a goal of ultimate spiritual attainment at all was a worthy endeavor.

As I proceeded in my business career, I started to notice some successful people leveraged their success as good stewards to humanity, while others selfishly pillaged what they could for personal gain. This reflected back to my experience in SRCM, seeing how some “advanced” abyhasis appeared very selfish an self serving, yet others did not.

I started to learn about the boundaries that one must place around oneself to protect against malicious attacks. Such attacks can come from the financial, physical, emotional and spiritual levels. One of these important boundaries was learning how and when to trust another person. When one achieves a level of attainment on any level, those who desire to topple or steal their attainment often attack them. This is equally prevalent in spiritual groups as it is in corporate and secular environments.

My practice of Sahaj Marg, and the resulting dependence and trust in a Master at such an early age caused me to not properly develop my boundaries with the world around me. This became a harsh lesson as I learned to deal with an abusive and mentally ill spouse and the Machiavellian politics of corporations and venture capitalists.

From my experiences after departing SRCM, I learned that the Inner Circle created by Gurus, is in fact a useful tool for self-preservation. A Guru of course has lots to loose, and must only trust those who have completely submitted to him. On a personal level, I learned that my trust must be earned, not simply due to repeated association, but by observing how individuals around me reacted to difficult situations. Under such pressure, one shows their true self. I learned the importance of establishing my own trusted inner circle, which to this day is a small group of individuals. I also learned that the strength of having others one can trust, establishes a base for ones own actions and contributions to the world. Inner Circles like anything can be used as a valid setting of boundaries, or as a base for power and manipulation. My experiences outside of SRCM helped to define these differences and determine exactly how I should use this concept to protect myself without falling into the lure of power and imposing that power on others.

The most difficult Sahaj Marg artifact to eliminate was the sense of urgency to become a more spiritually evolved person. This urgency ingrained in Sahaj Marg abhyasis reinforces a low self-image and a desire to overcome ones limitations through the dependence on the strength of others. The humility of this dependence on others is in fact not humility at all, but self-deprecation. Left unchecked for years on end, it creates a behavior pattern that assumes false security that the Master will eventually correct ones faults and one will achieve spiritual greatness.

My re-examination into Christianity led me to the Catholic Church. I found people there who practice silent prayer, and re-learned Jesus’ message of forgiving ones self and others for their humanity and non-judgment. Meeting regular people doing charitable work within the church was the most inspiring message for me in my recovery of a power based spiritual practice. These people did not pretend to be anything other than what they were, humans with imperfections, but through their imperfect but sincere action they did extraordinary things.

After 15 years of struggling with my addictions to spiritual power, I sat in prayerful meditation one day. I felt restless, not very inspired, no swirling energy around the heart, head or central point at the base of the skull. In spite of this I felt my being. I accepted my spiritual being as it was, a gift from God, sacred in all its mediocrity. I suddenly felt free to accept my spiritual self for who I was. All sense of inadequacy faded, and I realized that the true subtle condition that is spoken about in SRCM has nothing to do with attainment through will force and power, but through acceptance of ones self. This can be achieved in an instant without the dependence on a Master, but it does require one to accept and live the life that is laid before them. True humility and charity is developed in real life as one learns their own humanity and human limitations.

A long path was taken to get me back to where I started at the tender age of 19 when I was first introduced to SRCM. I finally learned that it was ok to be me - that my lack of spiritual prowess was in fact an illusion. Accepting this allowed me to finally start my spiritual practice - the practice of accepting my life and living it, accepting my humanity and being it. The lessons in power learned from the process, however will serve me for the rest of my life.


HistorySahaj Marg was introduced as a revised method of Raja Yoga by Ram Chandra of Shajahanpur, India in the 1940s. Ram Chandra, referred to as Babuji, was a young disciple of Ram Chandra of Fategar, no relation, and affectionately referred to as Lalaji. Lalaji and his brother were a disciples of a muslim Sufi master who taught them the Sufi method of meditation and acknowledged its historical foundation in Vedic meditation practices.

Being young Babuji visited Lalaji only a couple times, and spent most of his time practicing meditation at a distance from Lalaji and corresponding with him by letters. When Lalaji passed away, he left many sincere disciples behind. It remains a controversy as to whether Lalaji intended an organization to be formed around his legacy or chose to have a single successor. His Sufi Master clearly had no organization, nor did he delegate anyone his sole successor, nor did Lalaji establish any organization around himself or his teachings. His brother, considered a spiritual twin also left a legacy of disciples, who also appear not to have claimed sole successor-ship nor created any organization. Yet, Babuji claims to have gotten direct orders in a dream from Lalaji to establish the Shri Ram Chandra Mission (SRCM), and claim himself as Lalaji’s sole successor.

This history leaves many loose ends. What is known is the series of events that proceeded as Babuji established the SRCM and began to attract very dedicated and evolved disciples into his inner circle. The most notable was the scholar Dr. Vadarachari, who died unexpectedly leaving a void in Babuji’s Inner Circle.

The practice of Sahaj Marg, Babuji’s reformed Raja Yoga, devoid of any Sufi references, was intended to be accessible to householders, and was not to be associated with any specific religion. It was a method for the disciple or abhyasi (aspirant) to have direct experience with God.

In the early 1980s, Babuji passed away, leaving an embattled organization behind. This spawned a series vicious legal challenges between senior disciples, fighting over who controlled the Mission. Parthasarthi Rajagopalachari (Chari), appeared to have the most credibility with his legal paperwork and legacy of accompanying Babuji on his various trips abroad, and was adept at early on establishing himself as the new President and Successor to Babuji. Splinter groups were spawned revolving around the son of Dr. Vadarachari, and Babuji’s son, Umesh among others. At the same time, competing organizations founded around Lalaji and his brother were also established.

Root Cause of the Failure of SRCM
Yoga acknowledges the power of thought, that thought focused on a thing, gives that thing power. The Yogic principles are based on the concept that creation is the result of an initial thought from the Ultimate, and that each human being a spark of the same initial thought also has their own creation spawned from their own thoughts.

SRCM promotes a process of meditation on the heart, a cleaning meditation done in the evening, and a prayer done at bedtime that acknowledges the living Master as the goal of life. The intent, was that thought, redirected towards the divine within would promote a more spiritually evolved human being. While the practice is supposed to empower the disciple to experience God and Reality directly, this is done under a veil of complete and total dependence and on and obedience to a living Guru. The danger with this type of practice is that if the Guru is not truly selfless, it becomes a power based relationship that benefits the Guru more than it benefits the disciple.

Core to the problem that has evolved as SRCM has progressed, is a culture that is fostered around spiritual attainment. Babuji established that a new vista of human attainment was possible through his practice, referred to as the Central Region. The resulting culture around attaining the Central Region has established a very dangerous precedent. Disciples, who are supposed to be reducing ego, are developing a self centered desire to achieve this spiritual goal and earn entry into a Brighter World at a highly evolved level in the afterlife. Exclusivity established in the SRCM culture caused disciples to believe that only through the SRCM and the support of the living Master could such high attainment be possible. This dependence on the Mission and Master promoted a competitive atmosphere where people vie for attention and favor of the Master in order to achieve their selfish spiritual goals and serve the Mission at all costs to self and family in order to gain spiritual favors. Lost in this culture, is any sense of selfless charity. All selfless actions revolve around serving the Mission and are in fact not selfless at all. The disciple assumes that their “selfless” contribution to the Mission will be rewarded with spiritual attainment and entry into the Brighter World. Clearly something is expected in return for unquestioning obedience to the Mission and Master.

In fact the very principles within the Yogic traditions around realities being created by thought, have been used to create a culture of psuedo-selfless disciples, who serve a Mission and a Master, in expectation of getting something in return. A grand deception results where the disciple believes they are promoting selflessness, but in fact, are selfishly sacrificing what they can to achieve something perceived as better for themSELVES. In the end, the ego develops a new veil. While the Master blames his disciples year after year in public admonishment, about the lack of progress, in fact, the grand deception itself has created its own barrier. Disciples have been trained to selfishly strive to attain something by serving a Master and the Mission that hungrily requires new disciples yearly.

SRCM has in fact created a culture that has completely deviated from the very principles that Sahaj Marg promotes. The root cause appears to be the Mission itself and a singular Master who claims sole successor-ship, without peer, and cannot be questioned. Disciples are encouraged to cease questioning the contradictions and in fact are told to ignore them as they are of this world, and it is only the next world that they should worry about.
Like the Wizard of Oz, they are told to ignore the man behind the curtain and focus on the light show before them, on the Master who will grant them their selfish wish to gain entry into the Central Region and be assured access to the Brighter World upon death.

Invertendo Revisited
Invertendo is a principle that has been aggressively promoted with in SRCM to explain every contradiction that one comes across in spirituality. The root of this principle comes from Lalaji’s book “Truth Eternal” where he claims that by starting from an ignorant state, we strive for knowledge, but after pursuing knowledge comes true ignorance.

In my own practice I have learned that in fact we start where we end. In fact, all this attainment and lust for achievement, once exhausted, resolves back to the very point of simply being, with the love of God in one’s heart. The journey itself appears only to serve the function of wearing down of one’s ego until one returns to the ignorant state that one started the journey with, eager to be part of God’s mystery. In fact, the Path or “Marg” itself is an illusion. This explains the contradiction of the Master bowing before the beginning disciple. Perhaps it is because the innocence that exists in at the start is corrupted and lost along the path, only to be regained when one finally gives up all desire for spiritual attainment, and simply desires to be near God for God’s sake, for Love’s sake. Perhaps, all along the disciple was never very far away to begin with.

This brings into question why so much focus and pressure is put on growing the numbers of disciples. If a new diciples bring their own personal power and surrender it to the Mission/Master, and provide their own thoughts to empower the Mission/Master, we have a process in which a Master can gather power and focus thoughts towards himself and his Mission to strengthen his own personal power. The most insidious concept of Invertendo could be that while by outward appearances, the diciple comes to the Mission/Master to get something, in fact the real power transfer is from the disciple to the Mission/Master.

The fundamental mistake made within the SRCM is the obsession with attaining a spiritual goal “The Central Region” rather than simply promoting “being” which in fact IS all that is left when one has achieved the elusive “Central Region” as, apparently any sense of self is all but lost and only identity or “being” remains. Sadly this fixation on attainment coupled with un-questioning obedience to a singular Mission and living Master creates the very scenario being seen in the history of the SRCM. The symptoms of this include:

1. Lack of true selfless charity

2. Selfish in-fighting amongst Inner Circle members of the Mission

3. Struggle between Inner Circle members for control of the Mission

4. Sacrifice of careers and family for the sake of the Mission

5. Intolerance of debate or independent questioning of the Mission

6. Intolerance of other religions - especially Christianity

7. Fixation on myths rather than direct experiences.

The last point is the most destructive of all as it degrades SRCM into a religion - Religion of the worst kind, one that has no checks and balances as it is controlled by an Absolute Leader who cannot be questioned. Propagation of these myths increase as tangible results from the practices fade. Myths include channeled messages from the Masters in the Brighter World, stories of Masters cavorting with the likes of Krishna and Kabir, and edicts from Masters delivered in dreams declaring the current living Master as “The Master of the Universe”.
As myths replace actual experiences, disciples thoughts are deflected away from their own experiences and towards these myths, which make them their own reality. The very yogic principles of thought focused on a singular thing, giving it power, has been turned upside down to establish power in Myths that now become a reality of their own with the collective thoughts of disciples focused on them.
SRCM, initially established as an organization that promotes a simple spiritual practice of God Realization that can be practiced by the common householder, has now become a power based organization using yogic principles to create a new Mythology and as a result a new religion. The question is, with all the divisions between factions, cultures and belief systems today, does the world really need yet another religion?


4d-Don said...

Hi Michael..

Great expose. Great writing. Ever think of writing a book?

Your expression of the feeling in Sahaj Marg when Babuji was in charge certainly matches the feeling I felt in Canada. We all felt that we had a special job to do and it did not involve numbers, structures or the material, but the spirit.

Were you privy to the what happened around Chari's father who after a few weeks with the Mission, was travelling around Europe claiming to be a Guru. And what is the "mirror image ritual" that was mentionned in Germany and the surrounding area, and is still in their written material Was that Chari's dad's ideas also or was that Sahaj Marg?

I can't wait to read the next instalments.

Congratulation for your courage and thank you for your dedication to helping your fellow spiritual sojourners. Many "innocents" who have stagnated in SRCM for years, have been waiting for such accounts that confirm their doubts about what they felt about the Shri Ram Chandra Mission since Chari "take over" or after Babuji's death. When I was younger, we always thought that to be a Master, one had to "not want to be a Master" as that would show a "desire". That certainly is not the case in the "Mission".

It seems that the Mission has hidden it's lineage in the Sufism of Lalaji's Masters (Islam), and many of the intrigues you talk about do not show a high level of spirituality at the upper echelons of their Pyramidal structure.

We are deeply grateful.


Christian said...


Thank you very much for your testimony. The historical facts you are revealing are simply vomitory.

They perfectly match with what most of people feel about Chari at first glance, and I must admit that it was my first impression too.

You really did not see anything? It seems that you take the excuse of being young at that time, but I know many young people who are aware of many things because their mind is new, and furthermore what you reveal was not that subtle.

Or were you yourself after power? You may not admit it, but if it was the case, it simply means that you were already stroke.

Chari knows the human soul very well, and he knows very well how to play it.


Alexis said...

Hello Michael,
Your last post is very interesting, I'm waiting for the others impatiently
Just a question : have you heard about Chari's poisoning with arsenic ? Do you have any details about it ?
I found this testimony about abhyasis' proselytism :
Today is the first time in my life that I have been harsh to someone whom I hardly know. But I practically had no other choice. It all started a month back, when I met an Indian couple here. They said they meditate everyday and there is a satsang at their place twice a week. I had been wanting to learn how to meditate and so I was happy when I heard this and expressed my desire to join. I had never realized then that it would become such a nuisance.
This was no small thing. They are followers of Sahaj Marg. That is a spiritual organization. I am not at all spiritual and I was not looking for any kind of spiritual guidance. I just wanted to learn how meditation is done, so that now or perhaps sometime later in life, I could do it if I wanted. I just thought that here we harldy get any opportunity to learn anything and I should not miss the opportunity.
I attended the basic introduction thing of 3 days and then I also attended one satsang. I realized by then, what it was about and I was not interested. I am a religious person. This organization is completely against religion and when I saw a video of the master giving a speech, I had a complete repulsion towards it. I found him to be extremely arrogant. I had no interest in being a part of a group whose leader I did not respect.
The other problem is that the couple have been following this since the past 10 years and are so much into it that they kind of force you into it. Anytime I said that I had more work at office and couldn't come, they would offer to postpone the satsang. I dont like it when people go out of the way to do something for me. Also, after each satsang they have lunch/dinner. The actual meditation lasts for 40 minutes but the entire socializing thing goes on for 5 hours! That was a little too much.
They went to Austria once to attend a satsang and end of next month they are planning to go to Denmark and have asked me to join as well! I would rather go to Denmark on vacation than go to listen to some speeches and meditate!!
Today again there is a satsang. I was not interested in going and mailed them saying so. But they don't give up so easily. They are pushing a little too hard. So I finally had to send a little harsh mail today telling them directly and clearly that I am not interested. But I am very sure that they will not give up even now. I am waiting for their next mail, trying once more to convince me to go.
It was my fault not to have found out more about it before joining. I just decided on the spur of the moment without giving it too much of thought. I am an impulsive person and this has caused me problems quite a few times.
I have never said anything harsh to anyone unless I am extremely close to them and can take the liberty. Hence, I am feeling kind of bad but I also know that it was a good thing to do. Else, I would have been unhappy and would have wasted my time socializing for hours together and not enjoyed it one bit!

Anonymous said...

Thanks Michael for this and other very interesting articles. Your knowledge and experience of the real world inside this kind of structure is very profitable for us (those outside the SM) and will be very profitable as well for all young abhyasis indoctrinated by this "business Guru". My sister is deeply involved with the developement of the mission and I know that other young Europeans dream to have the opportunity to be in India with Chari. Others, victims of their parents, are on their way to Chennai to study at the Omega school.
Your job will be useful for many, I believe.
Please continuous with your work!Johan

4d-Don said...

To all the Holy Innocents trapped in the Pyramidal Structure of Sahaj Marg…

If you are one of those who inadvertently and innocently entered a Totalitarian, Pyramidal Structure, (Channeled Brighter World of Chari’s Sahaj Marg) thinking you were getting into a spiritual (circle, sphere or a spiral) structure (16 circles of Babuji’s Sahaj Marg) this is for you. If you find that you do not enjoy the undemocratic, totalitarian, self-serving, manipulative, non-logical, no philosophy, un-caring, invertendo, lonely (no friends or family), life, and want to get out, you can engulf the triangle inside a circle (2d) or the Pyramid (SRCM) inside a sphere (3d).

As my SRCM preceptor (under Babuji) would say, put the light in your heart. Not the light as electromagnetic frequency, but the Light as “not heavy”. You can go in your heart and put in The ALL or the ONE (or any sphere or Universal concept-read Lalaji) in your heart and create a (16 circle) mandala and engulf or encompass the Pyramidal structure of the SRCM Mission and all inside it, all from the central region of it. Then you will be free from it, being both inside and beyond it. You will not be alone, we are all there, Christ, Babuji, Lalaji, Buddha, Grey Eagle, Chief Pontiac, et al. You name it. Greatness is not contained inside pyramidal structures (Missions or Churches). Churches are formed around the words and actions of the Great by the “power hungry”. No pyramid needed except for religions and power (military, scams, etc.), that quickly become tyrannies if the control of the circle is not exerted I.e. democracy.

You will find that you have enough energy or Love to start becoming conscious of, and caring for the family, the friends, the poor, the animals, the planet, the Universe. SRCM will then not control all your time, love, energy, money, etc…Then you can help your fellow sojourner or pilgrim regardless of religion, race, creed, etc… rather than isolating yourself inside SRCM and conspiring by your silence as your Master criticises family, friends, other faiths and belief systems. You can be a generator of the energy of Unity of ONE, rather that a consumer of the Divisive energy of ego (the navel gazers trapped inside the sensuality of the self).

The Circle can surround the pyramid (Sahaj Marg) for a democratic and spiritually empowering paradigm. You are free. If you chose to serve the Pyramid (SRCM), may you enjoy your journey into “power” from a “disempowered” status. A serf you will then be by choice. And we, the “free” and the freedom-lovers will work so as to keep reminding you of a choice being possible at any time you chose. You as a proselytiser for the SRCM will try and get others (friends, family, countrymen) to enter as an obedient “serf” into the Pyramid that is SRCM, where that person will also be serving the Pyramidal Mission (SRCM) from a disempowered status, just like you.

In Christianity, the papacy of the Pyramidal Holy Roman Catholic Church remained in Italian (Roman) hands and even in Specific families (the Medici) for centuries. Pyramids are not democracies and they corrupt energy flow by nature. (energy flow must change direction at the vertices resulting in pools of chaotic (divisive) energy to be used as “power” by self-serving individuals.

The choice is yours. Journey in servitude and obedience, or chose freedom and responsibility. We will try and get more freedom for the friends and family and countrymen of the whole planet that you will target. We hereby open the gates. You have a window of opportunity to express your freedom.

Chose the sphere of Spirituality and Freedom…not the pyramid of religion, cults and servitude…


Christian said...


I was wandering if it would not be the time and a good idea to separate the material management of the mission and the spiritual work. It shouldn't be both in the hands of the same man. Drifting is unavoidable with such a structure, provided the human nature.

Considering your reflexion with forms, in aikido, movements describing a square are used to lock and control, and movements describing a triangle are used to project the energy received from one point back to this point. This is some sacred knowledge and an esoteric aspect of the aikido. Circles are not circles or spheres, but spirals. They are used to change level, go up (to the sky) or go down (to the earth), and reestablish harmony between the sky and the earth. The circle or sphere does not exist at the physical level, for it does not allow any evolution of the situation. Circle or sphere is protection, you are in or you are out. It is immuability. It opposes void or the creator inside and the manifested creation outside.

In the pyramid, you find both the square at the basis, and the triangle as the 4 sides. This form is very stable. It really locks something at the base, and it seems that if the 4 triangles receive the energy from the summit and work correctly, they do the projection of energy at the same point. The consequence is that they will feed that which is at the summit and that which is beyond the summit with this energy. If the energy income is from the base or outside the base, or if the triangles do not work correctly, the projection is not in the same direction for the 4 triangles, and the pyramid will simply disperse the energy around in the horizontality.

Therefore, the pyramid is useful to maintain a head at its summit, or to disperse something around from the base (energy, information, a message).

However, this structure does not make the people (the base) progress upwards. It is not its function. Therefore, if the SRCM is a pyramid, it is helpless for the initial purpose for which it was built.

What would make people from the base progress is not a circle around the pyramid. That would be the perfect sect, which Chari is trying to build: a stable hierarchical structure protected in a sphere or womb from the outside world. Actually, one possibility to generate a sphere is to have enough people forming the body of the pyramid so that the mission shines by its number. This is the worst scenario, and it is now or never if we are to succeed breaking this wrong evolution.

What would allow people to progress is a spiral movement inside the pyramid, between the center of the base square and the summit of the pyramid. That movement should be initiated by the meeting of two forces: the desire of the disciple to reach god, which is a pushing force directed towards the summit of the pyramid or the master, and the aspiration or love of the master for his disciple coupled with a rotating movement to stabilize the ascent. Such a rotative movement can only be initiated by the master if it is to produce an ascent, because the master is above. If the aspirant initiates a rotative movement, he will only turn on himself, and if he deviates from the center, he will be thrown at the periphery by the force of his rotation. The master is essential, and only that kind of energetic structure could raise people at the summit.

It seems that this happened to Babuji thanks to Lalaji, and even that Lalaji thrown him above this summit, over the pyramid (which is the school and the teaching). To get this result, no need to have an imposing structure like the SRCM.

I hope that people will now understand why, for a pyramid to work correctly and bring people above it, the proportion between the base and the summit must not exceed a certain amount.

If the proportion is correct, the form is still a pyramid, and a spiral can be generated into the pyramid.
If the proportion is too increased, the summit of the pyramid is taken down towards the base, and there is not enough space inside the pyramid to generate a spiral. This means, concretely, that one man cannot manage so many.

An alternative would be to divide the base into subparts and have these subparts form the bases of n pyramids, which requires more than 1 master. This is what was attempted by Babuji with the preceptors. However, this structure failed because preceptors are the summits of smaller pyramids inside the big one, and they form themselves the base of another pyramid which has the master as its summit. Their goal is for themselves, and what they want is to be pulled up by the master at the top of the great pyramid. In the best cases (the preceptor is really faithful and devoided), they will succeed in projecting people above themselves, but this above is still inside the great pyramid. However, the most probable situation is that we are faced with the human limits of the preceptors: one will not accept so easily that someone else makes progresses and surpasses themselves, and therefore, the spiral, if it exists, will be there just to give some feeling of ascent, but the real ascent to god will never occur.

Furthermore, if the master is just interested in building the pyramid, no one will ever go above the structure. Most of them will be kept at the base or in the body of the pyramid because that is where they are usefull, until the moment where they are projected outside of the base by the dispersing flow of energy of the structure (as soon as the summit stops attracting you, the descending or projecting flow of the triangles will bring you back to the base before throwing you out).

Another spiral can be generated within one's individual or body, which could be what they call the aspiration for god or the craving. I suggest this alternative solution to the abhyasis through prayer, so that they will be guided to find someone who can take them to god.

I hope this brainstorm helps for the reflexion about the drifting of the SRCM, and why the SRCM does not help anybody to really go to god.


4d-Don said...

Hi Christian...

You said:

"I was wandering if it would not be the time and a good idea to separate the material management of the mission and the spiritual work. It shouldn't be both in the hands of the same man. Drifting is unavoidable with such a structure, provided the human nature."

I agree of course. That process of Reformation is what brought the power of the Holy Roman Catholic Church in check and one could make a valid argument for it bringing about the "Renaissance" in the Western World with all it's scientific and technological innovations.

As for the Pyramidal structure discussion:

In everything I say, think dynamic (moving) or 4d. So when I say circle, I mean the circle as a paradigm in 2d, that changes to a sphere in 3d and to a hypersphere in 4d, with an in/out or ana/cata motion, so spirals into a dynamic non-dogmatic evolution of circular type (as opposed to angular-type), structures where there is concentration of energy at the "changes of direction" points (the angles). The logic is to get the obedient sheep to get outside the pyramid structure and move to the Outside/inside (Ana/cata) of the structure where in spirituality, one is the ALL (inside the structure and outside the structure)....So no battle, engulf. Do not resist, flow, merge, become, be....

We are in agreement about the square locking energy and the triangle being used to project energy (in the form of power) Power is directed (vectored) energy. I also agree that circles being 2d, have a defining circumference and as such are limited. The sphere, to describe what I mean would have to be a dynamic sphere, like an "explosion" that goes on in time and space and yes creates a "spiral" as it expands but with another motion going in. I do not mean a "static" sphere, because that could become the paradigm of a cult, by locking in the energy, creating a static duality (inside and outside). The important word is "dynamic" or moving. The motion of the sphere has to have a 4d motion (inside and outside or Ana/Cata or kata). The motion will spiral.

When I talk about the pyramid, I use the tetrahedron or the 3-sided pyramid and a triangle at the base. As Buckminster Fuller calls them the "closest packing of spheres of energy". Joining the centres of three spheres (of energy) will give you a 2d circle. Add one more Sphere and, by joining the centres of the spheres, you get a tetrahedron or a 3 sided pyramid, with a triangular base. The only thing that defines the base or the summit is the lenght of the sides or the size of the spheres. That could be equated to the "numbers of members" or the processing potential of the Master. The larger distance from the summit or the higher the number of members, establishes the leader as more of less distant from the followers.

Here we agree again....The base feeds the summit and beyond the summit where in spirituality, it can be one of many paradigm for the contact with the Divine for the followers. A good leader will bring back the energy from the "outside" and distribute it fairly to the inside, always favouring the three vertices with more energy, because of the nature of the structure. (at the vertices, the energy has to change direction, demanding a concentration of energy and time). Those vertices (preceptors or precepts) then dissiminate the energy to the base. If they are all perfect, there is no problem. But in most cases, the power-hungry place themselves at the vertices and skim off the energy, corrupting the structure. As the structure becomes corrupt, the base will dispell the energy horizontally because of the negative impact of the "skimming" at the vertices and the "dictatorial" nature of the structure. Humans have a nature that wants freedom and also wants to Unite to be "free" or to participate fairly and evently in a structure. The minute there are "favourites" the other followers feel "left out" or discriminated against or disempowered and the structure becomes more dictatorial and uses "obedience" and other controlling and manipulative tools to keep the structure functionning. It becomes Machievellian and then what???

On a personal level, a Master or a friend (sufi) can throw, push or elevate others higher than themselves. We do it for our children and our friends. SRCM has become a MacDonald and has one recipe for all. The numbers are getting too great for the Master and the preceptors are not "elevated" enough, as those who work for free or low wages at MacDonald's do not care about "food value". Lalaji and Babuji knew about the "personal" touch that a "friend" has to give to be a "true friend". Chari thinks that he can "delegate" friendship and spirituality to other "power hungry", intellectual, materialist, or non spiritual preceptors and that the work will go on Magically. That is what we have with SRCM.....

So Yes....A spiral or a dynamic sphere that forms a spiral is what we want ultimately. If in 2d, that is a circle that resolves one dimension higher (3d) to form a spiral.....My idea is to get the followers beyond or outside the pyramid of Sahaj Marg under Chari....If the circle builds a cultish paradigm outside the pyramid, let it be dynamic and move in and out in a spiral. At least outside the Pyramid, it is a cult or a religion of ONE (the follower). The same with the Sphere, it must be dynamic so as to avoid the cultish and dogmatic aspect of the structure.

I think that Babuji, being a bureaucrat, thought incorrectly that spirituality could be taught to the masses using a pyramidal structure and an object-driven language, and it does not work. Not for Martial arts, or any arts or spirituality. It might work in engineering and the non-innovative technical trades. For innovation, we need mavericks and non-obedience. It has to be imparted as a "friend" or a "loved" one. That is the beauty of the Laws of the Divine. They are not Intellectual but can work intellectually if we use the correct paradigm. The pyramid is efficacious in 3d. To get higher, to the spiritual levels, we need a different paradigm. A Hypersphere or ???. There has to be motion built in, so no dogma, and no Master but a Master-disciple interchange where the Master is also learning from the disciple. That is not Chari....Maybe Lalaji .....Babuji created the SRCM structure that we now see evolving into the Corrupt SRCM of Chari....So that is not the answer also...

The ratio of base to summit should be in the Golden means or Golden ratio. I think the Egyptians, the Mayans and the Incas figured that one out...The spheres (all of them) outside is already feeding the summit of the Pyramid, we cannot stop that. It is the nature of pyramids. They project energy out and they receive energy from the outside. We want the numbers of followers to get outside the pyramid and feed inside as well as feed outside, so the structure should not be able to grow any larger that the "Golden Ratio" allows. Those outside the pyramid, have their source from the Interior Master, like all Spiritual Masters, not Chari....He is being Channeled to by Babuji??? using a French lady medium...He is not in touch with what I am saying. He lost it as he focuses on the Material or the structure of the SRCM.

If all the ratios and the lenghts of the sides (followers) were perfect and all remained non self-serving and preceptors at the vertices would not skim energy for the self inside the structure, the pyramid would work as an energy generator in the form of power (vectored or directed energy) tool. As a generator of energy as a self-growth tool that just emanates in a dynamic sphere around one, and is not directed (vectored or pointed) the dynamic sphere (3d) or the hypersphere (4d) is a better paradigm for sprirituality. There is less room for corruption (the use of emanated energy as vectored power).

This type of dynamism (motion or evolution) of structures, to be dessiminated in the Object-driven languages (European), where objects (solids) are moving in space and local Cause and Effect is the main paradigm, is very difficult and demands the discipline of creative linguists not only in spirituality but in theoretical physics and cosmology. David Bohm (a protege of Einstein), in his book on the Holographic Universe (the Implicate Order) mentionned exaclty that. We need to invent words that give us an more dynamic concept of n...dimensions. For David Bohm, it was the Implicate and the Explicate Orders and the "non-locality" of space and "hidden variables", that defied explanation and seemed to leave other physicists baffled. His theories have resurfaced in many books since then but are mostly misunderstood. In his book, he spends time defining words so as to give the reader a better understanding of his concepts. We need the same thing in spirituality. A living language that would rival Sanskrit and some of the other living languages (before they died or became rigid) from the Spiritual pasts of many cultures including our own.

Nice thoughts....Your martial arts is right on....Aikido eh?...application of Spirituality..


Michael said...

4d-don, Christian, and all others,

So many questions to answer. Sorry for my absence. I've had time only to post late at night when I have spare time.

I knew nothing of Chari's father or any mirror image ritual. No doubt however that the atmosphere of Sahaj Marg in Babuji's time was established to create mini-guru's around a central Special Personality. Preceptors who got the nod from Babuji certainly had the freedom to interpret things to attract their own fold. See my example of Andre Poray. While he was likely criticized in private by Babuji and others, he was allowed to continue his work un hindered.

I plan to get to this point later in this post, but 4d-don and Christian have already foreshadowed this in their Pyramid discussions, there is an obsession with power in SRCM, and the growth of the organizaiton is based on individual deire to have power.

As for my knowledge of Chari's arsenic poisoning, well, I have always assumed it happened. I knew a contemporary of Chari's named Don Saborin, who became a homeopathic doctor later in his life. He treated Chari occasionally and was involved in testing Chari's hair for arsenic. I trusted Don, and do not think he would be involved in any kind of charade. I don't remember hearing about the test results, but do remember Don continuing to speak of this poisoning as having happened.

I discovered the Indian obsession with poison from my Indian ex-wife who was also an abhyasi. When I chose to leave the marriage and stand up against her abusive behavior towards our children she used malathion to poison our children and herself in a vengeful attempt to destroy my life. It appears to be the prefered method of violence used by a passive society. Luckily in both my case and Chari's no one died. What was amazing about my case is all the Indians who came forward to defend her actions as "cultural".

I appreciate all the supportive posts. One, that I did not post, was a personal message to me to meet Sister Kasturi in Lucknow. I appreciate the kind concern for me, but I must make the following quite clear. I am not a wounded abhyasis desperately seeking a replacement for Chari's SRCM in another member of Babuji's disbanded inner circle. I have no desire to seek power for power's sake and therefore have no need to experience spiritual power of Kasturi. I was a guest in her house years ago, one of the few westerners to stay there. I have known how to reach her and there is little desire to do so. But to the dear fellow who suggested this, thank you for your concern. I am certain that you have a sincere heart and seek only God.

Love to all,


Christian said...

Hi 4d-Don,

an expanding sphere is the worst possible scenario. It really means a power structure (the pyramid, the mission), shining and expanding. It means a new religion on earth, nothing less, but nothing more.

That is absolutely bad.

The function of the pyramid is to generate a spiral inside it. The spiral is infinite: it does not stop at the bottom of the pyramid. It is the way towards god, and the pyramid is the generator.

Therefore, it is wrong to have a pyramid for itself, if we cannot use it just because the only one who can make it useful at its summit is not working correctly. I have shown that (1) he cannot work correctly with the actual structure - too big, and (2) he does not want this for all because he works for the structure, and not for the function of the structure.

The tetrahedron is not the correct structure to describe the SRCM.
It means 4 triangles, which implies that the master, at the top, can change his position with every other angle of the base, and that each angle of the base can be put at the sommit. This implies a master serving the structure as well as the abhyasis as an abhyasi, the position of the master being fulfilled by anyone, and the energy at the basis circulating freely.

This, maybe, was the initial structure or the whish that the SRCM would be like this, and this, certainly, is how the structure is presented. But this is certainly not how it works. Furthermore, to have a control means obligatorily that there is a square somewhere in the structure.

The triangle (2d) is clearly not enough too, but the pyramid is sufficient.

To reach stages above the pyramid, we just need to have initiated the spiral, and beyond a certain level, the travel goes by itself. It is for that, that we come to the SRCM and to Chari. That is what they both promise, and that is what they both fail to do.

I think that all this mess was initiated by Babuji, effectively. It is some point where we are separately coming to, you 4d-Don, Michael, and I, in our reflexions. Yes: there is an obsession with power in the SRCM, which was seeded by Babuji, and fully developped by Chari. That is why ALL the abhyasis in this mission are insane. It is how the structure blocks them and manipulates them.

Furthermore, I realized today that in 1983, it was not that long that Chari had been with Babuji (1983-1964=19 years). My question is: was a 19 years period, even of close association, long enough for him to get sufficiently deep into the teaching, to understand all its subtelty, preserve it from alterations, and transmit it? My answer is no.

Concerning the ratio Base/Summit, I took just one of the two possibilities in my analysis. There is a second one: if the form of the pyramid is maintained by growth, as it is the case in the SRCM, it means that the summit is moved away from the base. This is dangerous for the efficiency of the structure too: the force needed for the spiral to be generated is more important, and the travel into the structure is longer. The shorter the better... sometimes.


Michael said...

Christian and 4d-don,

As Christian has pointed out, the three of us have independently come to the same conclusion about Babuji, that his power based method is flawed.

A point I've made in the past and will make again here is the following:

A guru gets his power from his disciples. Without the masses, Chari or Babuji would not have power. This is why there is such a circus made about transmission. It is mad clear that transmission comes from the Guru.

SRCM would like to claim having re-discovered transmission. The transmission of spiritual conditions never went away. What SRCM did was create a focus point for it, the Master, and this resulted in a power based system. Disciples now feel that the Master is giving something to them and they give it all back in devotion and unquestioning obedience.

In the more subtle traditions, the source of transmission is not acknowledged.

I'll be putting more of my analysis on this in this post.

The Pyramid concept I believe is a valid one. Whether Babuji's intention was sincere, and he made a mistake, or devious, I can't really say right now. What we can say, by looking at the train wreck of alleged Central Region disciples of his, that his efforts did not produce selfless servants of humanity, but people obsessed with building personal spiritual power that requires disciples to fuel it.


Christian said...

Yes Michael.

The goal of the structure would be to take people to god as fast as possible, so that they can become themselves the sommit of another independant pyramid, and serve humanity by taking people over the pyramid to god again, and so on.

That is probably the only true spiritual service to god.

Therefore, in my view, the pyramid is a catalyst for humanity.

Chari, and before him Babuji, had twisted this by enclosing people in a belief.

We just forget to mention that Babuji never said that he was the special personality, am I wrong? Therefore, it might have been someone else...

Transmission is power. If not spiritualy speaking, at least socially.

We have at least three seeds of absolutism in Babuji's teaching: the central region, the transmission, and the special personnality. These seeds are the perfect ground for a power structure.

We can even guess, from this, that there was something wrong concerning Babuji's mental structure. This is something that can be shared by those looking for god, the absolute, the all powerfull, the supreme, the father, etc.

However, for Babuji, god was just the nothingness. More dangerous because more insidious. Where there is something, there is nothing else, but where there is nothing, there can be everything...


Michael said...


You are correct that Babuji never said he was the Special Personality, but it certainly was implied. All his "central region" disciples, will tell you that he was the Special Personality. This is the classic redirection technique I describe in my "Guru Exploitation" article. Establishing a high ideal - special personality, deciest Master, etc, and and redirecting the disciples attention to the living Guru.

All Babuji had to do was to establish the concept of a living Special Personality, and his disciples naturally associated him with it without question. I know Chari has said point blank that Babuji was the Special Personality. I suspect that all his other "Central Region" disciples will also say this. They have created this reality where, to them, Babuji IS the Special Personality.

Babuji was able to convince a large number of sophisticated, and evolved disciples to become completely dependent on his sphere of control.

Again power is the central theme throughout the establishing of Babuji's Sahaj Marg system - Power shrouded in a facade of humility and service.

This implies a completely different on the concept of invertendo than that whic is promoted within the SRCM. While the appearance is that of a Master infusing spiritual power to his disciples so that they can grow spiritually, the reality is quite the opposite. The disciples are attracted through what ever means necessary and their power is redirected to the Master who then uses it to grow his sphere of influence and control.


4d-Don said...

Hi Christian...

You said:
"an expanding sphere is the worst possible scenario. It really means a power structure (the pyramid, the mission), shining and expanding. It means a new religion on earth, nothing less, but nothing more.

That is absolutely bad."

You are "absolutely" making "absolutist" assumptions which I don't. LOL Watch you don't become dogmatic!...;-))

1- The dynamic sphere or more so the hypersphere, in its dynamic expansion and contraction, or ana/cata (in the silence of meditation) will "spiral" and is not static.
2- The sphere is not created by and does not represent Sahaj Marg, or a shining religion but is a dynamic sphere created by the individual. It is the indivudual who will shine in the "outside world" and the Sahaj Marg or the Religion will remain inside ( a personal thing)

The result is not an end but a process towards higher structures to empower the individual which I think will culminate into a spiral for the males at least because of the pyramidal stimulus at its base which creates a "spiral". A female I know likes the circle or the sphere as the female source of power and calls the spiral "male" because of it has direction (vectored) and not simply "IS". I am trying to encompass All. Angles represent the male, arcs represent the female. So I am trying to move from angles to arcs to moving arcs. So triangles and pyramids (angles) to circles and spheres (arcs) to spirals (moving arcs and angles).

Spiritality should encompass ALL and oppose NOTHING. There should be no "inside or outside" (4d) or "them and us"

I agree that SRCM is or was a Square based pyramid before the "Whispers from the Brighter World"...And then all of a sudden, we have a "medium" getting info from the ouside...and not the Master....So now SRCM has drifted (not intentially) into a pyramid with 2 summits or contact to the outside (the Brighter World), and not only Babuji but other "elevated souls" according to Chari......That is why I started thinking of the tetrahedron (triangular pyramid) and then destabalizing the rest of the pyramid and making it have more contacts to the outside....or inside the "individual" as true spirituality is intended to have.

The tetrahedron could be a paradigm for the "Master being the Student" concept as anyone at the point of a tetrahedron can be the summit and have contact to the outside, not only the ONE summit as in a square base pyramid.

Spirituality should empower the indivudual, not the structure or the leaders (preceptors) or the Master....The Summit will be empowered from Outside (GOD some claim...I don't)...So should all the individuals inside the structure. As it is now in Sahaj Marg, the preceptors have the power over the abhyasis and the Master has power over the Preceptors. That is a perversion of spirituality and is the paradigm for a religion.

I have been reading the "whispers"...What a crock of Bullshit....Hard to believe that people believe that Pap...Why not Nostradamus? or Blavatsky? or Ouspensky? or other Mystics....That is called "spiritualism", not spirituality...

I have read a bit of Freemason and the Illuminati power inside the Freemason and Shriner structures and they are "empire building" paradigms and very effective. Not necessarity spiritual but effective as a power tool. At least in the Freemasons, anyone theoretically can reach the summit by "learning" not by appointment by an individual as in Religion or cults...

I agree with your circular base as a step towards destabilizing the pyramid further. The circular based (structure, not a pyramid anymore) could then become a cone or a cylinder which are cubic surfaces....with its many surfaces including the 27 surfaces on the Cubic surface (or the Seal of Solomon, in three dimension).....

Very nice transition...but very esoteric.... for the few who want to spend the time ....

You gotta laugh cause it's not funny!


It's easy to laugh when things are funny, it's when it's not funny that you have to laugh!


Christian said...

Hi 4d-Don,

Now we are arguing between us and this is not good, I will not continue that way for this is a diversion of energy.

I tried to make my point and now I am just going to repeat myself.

Whatever the geometric problem, I was just suggesting something, which may not even be the reality.

We speculate from what we are. Let's go back to the facts.


Alexis said...

Could you specify us when and where the attempt at poisoning of Chari took place? Before the death of Babuji? Just afterwards?
Do you have more details about Andre Poray ? Who is he ? What did he do after Babuji's death ? I believe he left SRCM...
Who is this sister from Lucknow ? What did she do ? And now ?

Michael said...


I know the alleged poisoning was sometime in the mid 1980s. I don't recall exactly when. By 1988, it had already happened. As far as Andre Poray is concerned, I honestly don't know what happened to him. Chari taking over SRCM was not going to be anything he would have accepted, so he definately did not stay involved after that.

Kasturi, was an early disciple of Babuji. People in the Mission refer to her as a saint. She is indeed very saintly, and has stayed out of the bickering and is not involved with SRCM activities anymore as far as I can tell. I know she made one appearance to one of Chari's gatherings in India early on.

It has been 15 years since I was involved with this group, so I honestly don't know what she is doing today other than apparently she is still alive.


4d-Don said...

Hi All

By 4d-Don (SOCAN)
Key of Eb (Capo 3....Play C) in 5/4 Time- New Folk

(C) C F C
Oh my God-Man in the corner
Making up his holy verse
As the waves of transformation
Race across the Universe

CHORUS (after every verse)

Centuries of consternation
Will we ever work it out
Or will we flip the silver dollar
C C G Am
To see who's evil, there's no doubt
F C G c
Who is in, and who is out

Then he'll pounce from his jungle
Like a lion on a lamb
And he'll sell his pearls of wisdom
Like a salesman on a jamb

Oh the lambs are in confusion
In the shepherd's drunken sleep
And the ewes will simply scatter
And the Ram will simply weep

Now our home stands divided
Blame will strain the family tie
When one believes his self-importance
And his legends from on-high

For musicians...
This 5/4 Rhythm is like a 3/4 (waltz) followed by a 2/4 (reel)

Sing lyrics on the 4 & 5 & and rest on the "2-3" of the 1-2-3. As in (4)OH! (5)MY (1)GOD (2-3) and syncopate the (5) for a Bossa Nova feel.

Alexis said...

Your whole testimony is really interesting. Thanks a lot ! I'd like to diffuse it in french papers, blogs and websites, if Christian accept to translate it (he is a better translator than me)...
I’d like to have your point of view about sexuality and SRCM : you spoke a little about it in the 6th part. Separation between men and women during meditation is an old or recent practice ? Since Babuji, Chari ? What were their arguments ?
I believe Babuji said sexuality is forbidden in ashrams, isn’t it ? Chari’s speeches on sexuality (especially of westerners) is special. What do you think about it ? Is there any real differences beetwen Indians and Westerners ?
Some abhyasis have odd reactions about sexuality : abstinence, perversions, etc. What do you think about it ?
Same question to Christian

Michael said...


I have no problem having this blog translated into French or any other language.

As for sexuality and Sahaj Marg, I do plan to comment on this. Likely in a separate article. In India, sexes typically mediated separately. Around 1986, Chari made the anouncement that he wanted to impose this in the west as well.

Let me write the next istallment, on my recovery from SRCM before I comment on sexuality in SRCM.


4d-Don said...


Very inspiring. It confirms my experience also, coming from a Catholic background. The navel gazing, self serving, sensationalistic meditation that is SRCM, although very pleasant at first, does not lead to elevated spirituality but to stress, disease, conflict and more dependance.

I recently heard a Hindu speaker say that "service to fellow man was the only true standard of Sprituality, not meditation". I would not go that far, but I think that Sahaj Marg, when they removed the "tapas" (austerities, sacrifice) from Raja Yoga, took out the mechanism that would have protected them from becoming a "religion" or a cult (of an individual).

Welcome back HOME!!! God is ONE and we cannot get outside of IT, even if we tried. Outside of God is an illusion used by manipulators. Acceptance of self is the key....and love and service ...You and we, who heard the message of Love (Christ) in our youth, had it all along...

Maybe you, as a microcosm of the society that you live in, can now lead your fellow countrymen in taking the rightful place you once had, in your "Christianity", as "defender of the poor, the weak, the afflicted", and return your country to it's historic greatness as the champions of "freedom". No more "serfs" for Spirituality to the Power-hungry Masters of cults such as Sahaj Marg, but free inside the ONE God, as we were created.

That is the Revolution of the Times...

Good Work....Thank you for your courage,

You are truly a "GREAT PERSON"...

SRCM lost when they lost you. I am grateful that you are a kind, and generous person and not a "self-serving" abhyasi as so many others in this group (SRCM) have become....

May the ONE God Bless you and your Family....and keep you safe...and may your children respect your integrity as much as I do


Michael said...


Thanks for the kind words, support and encouragement throughout the process of documenting these experiences. It would never have happened without the encouragement from yourself, Christian and many anonymous posters.

...and special thanks for being the one who fearlessly points out when the emperor has no clothes when the rest of us neglect to notice!


artist317 said...

Hi Michael,
I read you blog with much interest and all of my guilt at quitting Sahaj Marg has vanished. I quit in 2002 after 22 years of practice because the whole thing promoted feelings of inadequacy, fear and guilt in me. I was told that it was the "cleaning". After doing much spiritual study I came to the conclusion that the divine, God, what ever you want to call it, would never want us to go through inadequacy, guilt and fear.
But, in all fairness, I do have to admit that Sahaj Marg was a great help to me in the beginning. It actually saved my marriage by giving my husband and me a spiritual base, a foundation. But I always had doubts as to the veracity of the teachings and the Master himself. Yet, for those who do believe, that's well and fine. I don't believe a loving God would condemn any of us, believers or non-believers.
I am the type of person who prefers taking bits and pieces from many teachers and books and putting them together in a personal spiritual system that works for me. And I don't believ in the need for an intermediary to be in contact with the divine. Any spriritual system that is too highly organized is not for me because I also believe that high organization craetes a structure where the head of it simply has too much power and beinga human being, power can corrupt.
So to readers of the blog, if you have fear and unbearable guilt and pain, specially at Sahaj Marg functions, as I did, it is OK to quit. Search for what works for you and if it stops working, change it. Change is good!

Michael said...


Thank you for your post. It is good to hear confirmation from others who have left that have had the same liberating experience upon their departure.

I agree with you that the Sahaj Marg has some benefit early on. To this day, I feel that my early experiences with SRCM were beneficial. Had I taken those experiences and left after the first year, I would have nothing but admiration for the organization.

It is the dependence on the Master and System and the guilt and inadequacy that is imposed on members after they have been completely indoctrinated in the system that caused problems with me and others.

If less focus was placed on growing and retaining the numbers of disciples, and more focus was placed on serving humanity, SRCM could be far more effective as a spiritual organization. That, however would require that SRCM give up its power over disciples and be willing truly let people come and go as they please.


cylon said...

What are your 50,000 thoughts a day creating?

Our thoughts create our reality. This is a simple truth known by all people involved on the spiritual path. It is one of the most taught universal principles in the personal development field. Yet it is one of the most misunderstood!

People practice visualisation, affirmations, they use hypnosis, subliminal programming or countless other tools to transform their lives. However they fail to recognise one key area in their lives that hinder these wonderful techniques from being effective.

They sit day after day visualising their perfect scene and yet nothing happens. Why? They have followed all the instructions to the letter! They have chanted and imagined! They have formed a colourful, vibrant scene in their minds and affirmed that this is their reality. Then all of a sudden things get worse! What is going on?

Would you like to know the secret? Would you like to know why these people get no results? Would you like to hear one powerful statement that explains everything?

Good. I will tell you why these people get no results or even opposite results to those they are aiming for -simply because of the following truth. Consciously controlled thoughts such as visualisations do not materialise - ALL thoughts materialise!!!
Most people believe that if they visualise for 10 minutes a day their lives will magically transform. This is not the case. You must change your core thinking. You think approx. 50,000 thoughts a day. How many of those thoughts are working against your ten minute visualisation?
You can control the thoughts that enter your mind by changing the way you view the world. You can decide which thoughts you give energy to and which thoughts you discard.

The thoughts that you follow and give energy to become more dominant than the thoughts you discard. Your subconscious mind records these as your dominant picture on the issue at hand. You then move towards this picture because your subconscious mind starts making your outside world reflect the picture that you have stored internally.
Your mind should be on whatever you want. The picture you need to have is a positive vision of you already having achieved your goal. To realise this vision you need to focus and concentrate. Remember thoughts are real, they create your reality.
Let's say you have been visualising a new house. You spend your ten minutes in meditation picturing yourself living in your dream home. You finish your session and get up feeling positive that you will achieve your goal. Then during the day you get a heating bill through the post and exclaim "Oh no look how expensive this is I cannot afford to heat this house". Where is your focus in the present moment? What are you affirming? You are telling your subconscious mind that you cannot deal with what you have. You are affirming that your life is not how you want it to be. If you knew without doubt that within a week you would be moving to your new home would you honestly be worried about a heating bill? Perhaps other doubts creep in like "I should be happy with what I have", or "I will never get this house looking the way I want it" and so on and so on.
These thoughts that are not aligned with your goal. You are not giving complete attention to what you want. Whilst you are dealing with these other lines of thought your attention is not on your goal.
If you are aware of your thoughts you will suddenly realise that you have spent much more energy on counter productive thoughts than on creating a dominant picture of the goal you want.
Point your focus in the direction of you're the life you want. Think about what you want NOT what you don't want. It's that simple.

Your focus determines your reality. Change your focus and you change your life. hypnosis

Michael said...


Good point, but knowing the history of this organization and seeing the inner workings of how people interact with it. I believe the problem is more than the other 99% of thoughts they have during the day when not actively doing the "practice"

My thesis is that the organization itself promotes narcisistic, selfish thoughts and resulting behavior. People are attracted to SRCM out of thoughts of spiritual inadequacy and need. Additional thoughts are fostered that only the Master can fulfill these needs and resolve the inadequacy. The large organization creates thoughts of distance from the Master. The result is selfish thoughts that strive to please the Master and get his attention.

So the very thougths fostered in the organization itself causes the problem here. It is well beyond what extra-curricular thoughts are fostered when not practicing meditation.

The results are measureable simply by observing the historical behavior of those in the inner circle.


4d-Don said...

Hi Michael...


Go and take care of your family and your new business and may the ONE God bless you for your courage.

May your sons come to realize the "greatness" of their Dad.

Thank you kindly for your support and your encouragement over the last two years. I found more "love", "compassion" and "charity" among those who, like yourself, left the "Mission" than with those who "bull-headedly" try and rationalize their "addiction" to an autocratic and heartless organization of "businessmen" and "nationalists" who are caught in their irrational and illogical lust for "power" and "influence". The next generations will tear down their "altars" to their false gods, their idols and to "themselves".

May they all find the ONE god and eventually, they will...We all will!! We all do!!

I am grateful for having met you, even in virtual space, I feel you!


Christian said...


I did not read your analysis until the end before today, and the last question you raise is a major issue.

The world doe not need a new religion, but a synthesis built on the confrontation by the intellect of the myths with the real.

I have started the blog SPIDI to continue the work in that direction, with the hope that the new structure we have now (the blog of 4d-don, Alexis, Elodie, your blog, and this new blog) will be insightful.

My guess is that now we must not stop, but continue the work at another level.

We have finished to build or explore the basement and can start something else.

A next level, fed by the information from the base, which must be reorganised and synthesized to show a more global view from above.

A more global view which will itself bring new questions and insights.

These last days, I have been reviewing what we all did, including the bloggers and the anonymous, during the last few months, and I must say that it is really a great work, both in quantity and in quality.

My mind was turned completely negative few days ago, which helped me destroy my blogs.

This was finally helpful, because once done, a new perspective became visible and possible.

So, Michael, I have understood that you are yourself moving towards the end of the building of your blog, but I invite you to consider that your blog is not an end, but a first step.

I hope that you will pursue the work at the next levels.

Just consider that we do not know where we are going. It is an adventure, and we must just let the work guide ourselves.

Applying the methods of the free massons work great.

Michael said...


I have little interest in efforts going forward. My task here was to document my experiences as accurately as I could and provide some background and analysis.

I believe there's sufficient information here for people to make their own choices. There is little one can do to change someone's choice to remain in the Mission. I have little desire to convince people to leave, nor do I have any desire to create a new organization to counter the SRCM. I've explored the other organizations that already exist and feel little need to get invovled with any of them.

The work ahead for me remains being a good steward of this information and insuring its availablity to those who choose to access it. In addition, our combined blogs have become a means for the many people without a voice to express their thoughts and experiences. I may not agree with everything. Some comments border on the negative, but I do not feel that is a reason to stop allowing them to be posted as of yet.

I know that you had problems with some very negative posters and had to close down your blog. This is a sad statement on spirituality in general. I support your efforts to continue your research in the way you have chosen, but I am not a researcher. Therefore, my work is done and I now can get back to my life and own spiritual path without interruption.

I appreciate your support and the support of the many people who have encouraged me to get this body of work done. Without the encouragement from you and Don, I might not have bothered.

Feel free to use whatever I have posted here in your research in your quest for truth. If I can provide information I will certainly be available to do so. I do feel however, that everyting that I have to say about SRCM has been said here and my contribution to sheading truth and light on the subject is complete.


Christian said...

Hi Michael,

ok, this is a good thing you are doing and I'd like to do that myself.

however, I have still this insight guiding me to go further and I cannot rest yet.

Stay tuned from time to time and you will surely find yourself still of any use.

As we say in french: "bonne route!"

PS: My older blogs can still be read on the new blog.

Anonymous said...

Dear Michael,
Many thanks for such an interesting article and analysis.

You may like to know that years ago after I had sent Babuji a long letter, he replied saying:
Being beocomes becoming.
Affectionately yours,
Ram Chandra.

With best wishes.

Michael said...

Dear Anonymous,

Thanks for sharing a section of your letter from Babuji. Indeed there are indications that "Being and becoming" are stressed from time to time in the early days. However, Attainment through Obedience to the Mission appear to have overshadowed these key aspects of spirituality in the early days of Sahaj Marg.

May of us continue on this path of "being" long after leaving the organization. It is not exclusive to any particular system.


Mr.Critic said...

The following things in SRCM makes it hard for an abhyasi:

1. On one hand saying that the true master is God, and calling the Guru as Master on the other hand. Its a confusion.
2. The idea that you can connect to God only through your Guru. No direct access to God.
3. If you leave SRCM, you have left your Guru (implied) and so you don't have access to God and his grace anymore (transmission)
4. Irrespective of your spiritual progress i.e., even if you have practiced in this system for 30 years and the Guru has told that your spiritual condition is high, if you leave the mission, you will fall into the ground, you will lose all your progress.
5. Tolerance for improper behaviour of preceptors, and other senior members.
6. Feeling struck in an organization that one cannot leave easily after being in it for a long time. You can dis-associate yourself from a social organization or a company easily, but a spiritual organization like SRCM, if you have developed total faith, its not easy to leave.

Sandra said...

I appreciate your comments and to be honest with you, my in-laws just left Sahaj Marg for some of what you described. My one concern is that some of the things you state are simply not true; I'm talking facts here, not opinions to which you're are entitled and no one can refute.

Sahaj Marg is a non-profit. I have NEVER ever been charged to go to a gathering or pressured to buy books, magazines etc. I've been in SRCM for nearly 14 years and this has never occurred. I've been a poor grad student for some of this time, so I really didn't have the money to give and it has never been a problem. I just want to make sure that is honestly represented.

Again, I apologize for the suffering that you experienced and wish you well as always.

Michael said...


No need to apologize for my suffering. I am grateful that I was set free.

In response to your comments - there are two assets that are of value in SRCM, money and people. People who have no money are still an asset to the organization.

In the early days of SRCM growing in numbers was not a priority. "Quality not quantity" was the motto. Training was offered for free and books were cheap or given away. Gatherings were not profit generating events.

That is all gone now. The organization is fixated on growing in numbers and in wealth. Poorer disciples are not asked to pay, on the other hand they generally are not invited into the inner circle either.


Anonymous said...

For the naive who claim that "I've never been asked to buy or donate", don't seem to understand "marketing" of products. Those who don't buy, bring other people who do, and are the word of mouth "judas goats", who get their friends "curious" and in the reasearch, they BUY to find out...then they may "try it out" and if the game is played properly (without those "curses" that are the BLOGGERS), they buy some more (photos, icons, books, food, rent, travel, etc...(yes the rents, food, and travel are part of the GAME of marketing...Look at your FOOD receipt and see if the back side says: DONATION, so as to "cheat" on the taxes as a CHARITY...

This is what Chari calls his "brothers and sisters who leave the MISSION in "He, the Hookah, and I",

"The common people (mortals) , they are people who come, judge, and judge again and consider starting blogs on the computer, which is now a curse because everybody has a computer. And these blogs can influence the mind of an abhyasi more than the truth of the practice (…) Why do we ignore the proof that we produce in ourselves in terms of a certain level of relationship with the Guru, and prefer the claims coming from disgruntled people who have left the Mission, who dropped out, who have renounced, who are the enemies of spirituality. "

What's next? A Fatwa? (Muslim death sentence by decree)


Anonymous said...

To the Naive and Gullible of SRCM (California)

Here is what your children will be taught by the "Brothers and Sisters" with the VBSE of the SRCM (California) at their Religious Boarding School, the LMOS (or LMOIS). (Why OMEGA? Is it the END?)

In most countries, this is called "religious Intolerance" and hate literature and is being taught to CHILDREN...That is what the NAIVE of SRCM are promoting and endorsing. The abhyasis is to bring CHILDREN to fill the schools and "endoctrinate" the next generation with more "RELIGIOUS HATRED"...

Stand up and HAVE THAT CHANGED or get out of the GANG!! YOU ARE THE JUDAS GOAT...


There are five very important reasons, why we should get away from religious bondage –

a. It creates division among people.
b. Every religion talks of "one God" but states that only their God is the best.
c. It promotes disharmony, violence and wars. (my highlight in red-see my blog for allegations by Founder's (Babuji) family)
d. The real meaning of the tenets is forgotten and only the rituals are adhered to.
e. Religions put fear and temptations into the hearts of the people. (my highlight in red-see my blog for example of "FEAR" tactics used by Chari

All religions in the world say the same thing i.e. "seek within". But do they? The answer is NO. Then what is the way? Transcend religion and move towards spirituality.

...Love of God, to become one with Him.

(my highlight...4d-don says: Notice that "They" attribute the Masculine to the DIVINE)


Anonymous said...

Dear Michael,

I have been following the discussions and postings on allmost all blogs as long as they exist.

I have had my own experiences with SM and left.

I want to sincerely compliment you on the great work you did in analysing your own experiences and presenting them in these excellent texts. On top of the quality of the texts as a product, what I appreciate even more, is the tone and the attitude of tolerance, respect and understanding, or perhaps I even must have the courage to say that your words also demonstrate what can be ment by 'love'.

Thank you.


Anonymous said...


STF here,

Isn't it possible that the transmission in SM really is giving one the best link with the divine one can get. Isn't it also possible that SM, and Chari at this point in time is the being that is best suited to delivering the transmission into a persons heart?

In getting the transmission or divinity, can't it be possible that a human can then become divine his or herself, and then not be so power driven? I agree, it seems most certain that many in the inner circle are power driven, yet, have you not seen a transformation out of the power driven type to that of a blissful, loving state? I have seen some transformations like that. We are all still humans with our samscara's.

So, no I don't see Chari as this power driven person Michael seems to. He seems to sincerely want all of us to become divinized, not caring for money over that at all.

You also speak of the lack of charity in SRCM. It is true that materially, SRCM can't compare to most any Christian religion, but I feel you get so much more in the SM system, and then by being a light of love, you are actually giving so much more that a few dollars, you'll teach the man how to live correctly, with love, and that love will grow.

thank you for the chance to blog here.


Michael said...


Thanks for your comments. You are always welcome here!

It is not only possible, but it appears to be true that Chari represents these things to YOU. I cannot, and will not judge this as it is your personal experience.

However, since you brought up the possibilities:

Its possible that a Guru can establish an environment by drawing the divine energy of like minded seekers to a focal point - Himself. It is possible that this collective energy creates the experiences of divinity when in the Guru's presence.

It is also possible for a Guru to use this collective energy put up a facade of sincerity, but in private, to be a resentful old man who resents the heathen masses who clamor at his door, but knows that he must tolerate this in order to draw spiritual power from them to create the facade.

It is also possible that disciples receive some benefit from such association with collective energy and in doing so believe that their source of this energy is the exclusive and only source.

It is also possible that I have witnessed the collective energy being exploited by more than one Guru, but I choose not to degrade my blog into being a personal assault against anybody. I choose instead for it to be an accurate account of my spiritual experiences and an outlet for my own analysis for others to make their own heart felt decisions.

So yes, in spirituality there are so many possibilities. I only ask why anyone should limit themselves to a singular individual who insists that we would be lost without submitting blindly to them and ignoring the possibilities of other sources of guidance?

If you are suggesting that I go back to limiting my possibilities, alas, I have seen the vast expanse before me and would rather die than return to the cage I allowed myself to be enslaved in so many years ago.

All the best to you on your path my friend... I'm certain that your sincerity will reveal to your heart the possibility that you already bask in the totality of BEING if this hasn't become apparent to you already.


Anonymous said...

Hi STF...

You say:

...and Chari at this point in time is the being that is best suited to delivering the transmission into a persons heart?

What part of that is "natural"? Does the cedar have to rely on the Spruce to be "transmitted" to by the SUN or the ONE (DIVINITY)?

Does the DIVINE not transmit to ALL (creation) all the TIME...if the Divine needs a MAN to transmit, is it DIVINE? That would create a 'co-dependence". The DIVINE simply IS and it "emanates" or "transmits" all the time... Chari as part of the CREATION, DOES or ACTS. This is the acme of the sin of "ego". The egotist claims: "God can't do this and he needs a MAN (me) to do it".

Where are Chari's spiritual credentials? Who appointed Chari? Himself or his SRCM (California)? It is certainly not the SRCM founded in 1945 by Babuji who chose Chari, according to Babuji's Family and others in the SRCM (Shahjahanpur).

His tactics in dealing with "contrarian" voices is not even "legal", let alone ethical or moral. (re-registering a society in another country, his stand on "homosexuality", his teaching to children that God is MALE, his claim that "women can't be MASTERS", etc...

You say:

In getting the transmission or divinity, can't it be possible that a human can then become divine his or herself, and then not be so power driven?

As above, DIVINITY IS, not DOES, not "BECOMES". A human will remain HUMAN until the tranformation of "DEATH", and the DIVINE still IS. What is HUMAN in us is also the DIVINE in us, and will not "become" more DIVINE, it IS the DIVINE, already and always was and always will be for ETERNITY. There is no 'MORE DIVINE" or "NEW DIVINE"...

And the DIVINE is not only "in the heart" of man, but also in the brain, the rectum, the hand, etc... in other Words, the DIVINE is EVERYWHERE and EVERYWHEN...The DIVINE is "non local". The DIVINE, being "all powerful", DOES NOT NEED CHARI...or anyone or anything, to transmit...if it does, it is not the DIVINE...IT is not the ONE!

You say (about Chari):

He seems to sincerely want all of us to become divinized, not caring for money over that at all.

If Chari wants us to "be" (not become) DIVINIZED, why does he not realize that we, as a spark of the ONE, just like him, are DIVINIZED already? We don't need his "transmission" to "become" Divinized. Is that not a "sickness" or a "megalomania"? Do you think that of yourself? Are you less than Chari?

Is there a TIME in the DIVINE CREATION, the ALL, when the DIVINE is not DIVINE everywhere and everywhen for ETERNITY. Does the DIVINE improve, grow, change, BECOME? If the answer is YES, then it is not the DIVINE or the ONE of Swami Vivekananda, Plato or DON. Call IT by another name for the sake of communication and understanding.

You Say:

...and then by being a light of love, you are actually giving so much more that a few dollars, you'll teach the man how to live correctly, with love, and that love will grow.

That is the RUB... We do not see this LOVE at SRCM...not in Chari, not in the abhyasis who love Chari, his religion and culture, but not their own families, pets, cultures, countries, etc...

"By their fruit you will know them"

The way Chari treats those who disagree with him is not LOVING, by my standards. We, the bloggers, are not the "enemies of Spirituality" but we do not believe in Chari's fantasy and self-promotion of his imaginary powers. We are true "seekers", and are also a spark of the ONE. All Chari and others like him do is to 'regurgitate" the energy of "numbers" back to the MASSES. He does not "increase" DIVINITY as IT is already AT FULL POWER...and always was, and always will be, for ETERNITY...no beginning... no end...That is ETERNITY...

Everything is "possible"...but a Divinity that "becomes" more, greater, etc... is not LOGICAL or not a very "lofty" logic. It is possible but is not REALITY any more than the planet, the sun, the galaxy all spin in one (not two) directions. It is possible that they could spin in the "opposite" direction but the REALITY is that it is NOT now spinning in TWO directions...That is not PROBABLE... And is not the REAL-ITY (the REAL WORLD) that one wants to FEEL when one meditates...

Caught in one fantasy with Chari, one can change and contact directly the "transmission" from the ONE, just like one does not need another MAN to transmit the energy from the SUN. NO need for "proxies" for the ONE anymore...It is in our BEING (not only in our heart, the lowly PUMP or the slave...the heart is not the seat of the SOUL any more than the brain, the hand, the liver, the kidneys, etc...). The heart is the center of the BLOOD system, that's the TRUTH...The Brain is the center of the NERVE System. That is also the TRUTH. The heart has an audible sound, and an audible rhythm. The brain has an electro-magnetic hum, and a rhythm of 5-8 hertz. It is just not "audible". The Brain is our contact witht the "outside world" and is also the interpreter of stimuli and the creator of LOVE(attractive or rejective). The quality of LOVE created depends on the stimulus and it's benefit or detriment to the ENTITY.

The heart,like a "dump pump", just keeps on PUMPING...


Anonymous said...

Hi All
I have gone thru a few comments here. I truely believe u all as my friend's experience has also been the same in the mission. I appreciate the pains taken by u all to expose the mission. i would like to know more.

Anonymous said...

Hi anonymous (chose a User ID)

There are many other blogs in North America, Europe and Asia of ex-abhyasis who are speaking out and exposing the Pitfalls of this type of "spiritual capitalism" that is the "all-new" SRCM(California) of Chari, the ex CEO of a MILL with the TTK Group of Companies in India. This TTK is into politics, business and religion and the arts and has been for a long time. This is not a guru living in a cave in poverty and being spiritual, but a "king of industry" who now claims to be a GURU by re-registering a small meditation society and using it to gain access to other countries and their markets. It wants to be "non -profit" and "charitable" for obvious reasons (free travel, lodging, and a ready-made "market" for "products".

Some other sites:

The Sahaj Marg Project (the historical perspective)

Freedom from SRCM-Sahaj Marg
(discussion site owned by Indian ex-abhyasis who is now divorced as his wife is also an "abhyasi")

Our World from Another Dimension
(My blog...with some translations from French blog from Elodie's Blog in France)

Pitfalls of Spirituality
(a new blog by a Dutch ex-abhyasis, analysing SRCM and Spiritual groups in general)


and many more in many languages, that you will find the links to on these and other sites...

Have fun...

And you gotta laugh, because it's not funny! ;-))


satheesh said...

i read very intellectual,convincing and crispy moreover juicy comments or analysis and interpretations by our chaps...but if see them in nutshell,they are very much biased,misinterpreted and falsifing infact thought ful[NOT HEARTFUL!!] statements,they never came from true heart but from depressed,arrogant and not-truth seeking, very bundle of mind alone....i would request you all not only to rely on mind but bridge it towards HEART. AND SEEK FROM HEART ITSELF.